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Depu Techiikue
05-07-2006, 09:29
He grew up, neglected by his missing father, drugged induced mother,
Manipulated by his sister, feeling like a substitute for her dream brother,
His mother so wrapped up in drugs, he stole money from her to eat,
At 1 am, sitting, eating his dinner outside the resturaunt on the street,
He was so innocent, never hurt anyone, but always under distress,
His life wasn't meant to be, it was a mistake, that was his guess

At the age of eight, the government forced him to live with his father,
He wanted his mother to call him, but for five years she didn't bother,
The rest of his life went downhill, he was meant for his own destruction,
Kept his anger, sadness, suffering quiet, never initiated a discussion,
Eventually he became suicidal, didn't want to suffer for living,
His whole family blew him off, he couldn't make himself be forgiving

Now he asks himself, who would care if he was dead or still alive,
He's gotten to the point where his best friend is a set of knives,
His father identifies him as the cause behind everyone's pain,
He watches their actions, and he feels they think the same,
Dreams of dying, and sees his little brother is the only one who cries,
So he drops the knife, and can only produce tears, from his eyes...

Meta
05-07-2006, 10:40
Ouch, kind of left me speechless.
I really like it a lot, but sometimes I find the sentences to be a bit long for a poem, but then again I'm no expert or anything.
The meaning of it is deep though..

Depu Techiikue
19-07-2006, 01:52
Thanks for the comments Meta. Glad it was able to come across as a deep message, it was based on someone I know, so I was able to use real events as inspiration, which made it a bit easier to express the emotion. Glad you liked it though.

Yuna_03
27-07-2006, 01:26
i really liked it i found the sentances a little long too but overall i really loved it

Depu Techiikue
27-07-2006, 19:51
Thanks Yuna, appreciate it. Yeah they were pretty long, I felt like I was writing a story instead lol

Glad you liked it though.